Mom's Teapots!

Holding on tight to the last bit of composure remaining; I laid the teapot on the counter and hoped I could get out of there before the flood gates started. It was proving futile as the gallery owner went back to find its proper box. Tears began to well up and I could see by the mirrors set out for customers making jewelry decisions that my face was a few shades redder too. She returned all perky at her conquest of the box but got a puzzled look on her face when she looked at mine. She didn’t ask and I didn’t offer, just thanked her and headed quickly for my truck. Once there I mechanically started the engine and headed down the road where in less than a mile, the deluge happened. Deep sobs from somewhere primal as I looked down at the last teapot I would ever buy for my mother.

She loves the Southwest and in one of her many visits discovered these beautiful Chinese teapots at a little gallery. Each unique; a small triangle, a decorative box, a fish, an owl and still another, a ram. It became a tradition; Christmas, mothers’ day and birthdays. On each I would find another treasure for her to display on her lighted glass shelf.

But I stopped a few years ago, the reasons now seems silly. Since she was in her 3rd or 4th year of battling cancer, I thought perhaps she wouldn’t want me to keep buying something that she wouldn’t be able to enjoy for years to come. Then there is the selfish (I can’t believe I’m even admitting it) reason…guess who is going to end up getting those little dust collectors. I know…bad daughter, shame on me.

But something changed recently when I heard the cancer had now spread throughout her system. It changed from that unknown time frame of still fighting, to the realization that time was now very short. Anyone who deals with cancer knows you live in a kind of limbo land, a time warp world, never knowing what the future holds, unable to plan and your life seems to be in a bit of a holding pattern. But with this latest prognosis and the realization that time was now limited, it hit me that TODAY, she is still very much alive, she still appreciates beautiful things and she still loves teapots. I had an urgent sense to run down to that little gallery and see what new treasure I could find her. And believe it or not, I’m looking forward to those teapots (no longer dust collectors) sitting on my shelf to remind me, not only of her, but that each and every day we are still very much alive.
So today, I bought her a teapot.